Nom upon tasty, geeky things!

Welcome to The Geeky Kink Event! If you’re new ’round these parts, you can find out more about us over on our About Us page.

This year we have two delectable offerings for you to nom upon! Feast your peepers on these and tickets are on sale now on our registration page!

Eating Candy Off Of Naked People: $21 per person

“I have one metric fuckton of candy.” ― Brent Black​

GKEClassic-EatingCandy - Edited

You may’ve heard of eating sushi off a volunteer human table. It’s often in very formal settings, sometimes as part of rather fancy events. And while we love sushi, we also REALLY love candy… (do you see where we’re going with this…?) That’s right! We get to choose what we eat off of other folks and we chose candy again! It was a great hit (pun intended) last year and it’s affordable, fun, and fits the playful nature of our event rather perfectly. And…y’know…WE JUST WANTED AN EXCUSE TO EAT A LOT OF CANDY. Given that we’re adults, we can do just that; come join us!

Brainy Build-Your-Own Buffet- (w/ a Side of Burlesque!): $45 per person

“I don’t want to spend my life not having good food going into my pie hole. That hole was made for pies.” -Paula Dean

Build Your Own Buffet – We’re special ordering gourmet burgers (beef, veggie, and turkey), hot dogs, mashed pototatoes, and burgers, and we’re going to serve them with a MASSIVE fixin’s bar, full of tons of delicious things to pour atop your meal.  The permutations are endless!  (Okay, not literally endless, but Jeff Mach is really bad at math, so he can’t actually tell you how many permutations there’ll be.  “Lots,” he says.)

The most famed and beloved acts by this famed and beloved burlesque troupe – The Ink & Paint Club Burlesque! See performances and acts not seen anywhere else at the event and nom upon food how YOU want it. Start with the basics of juicy burgers (beef and veggie), tacos, hot dogs, and mashed potatoes and add all kinds of things from our MASSIVE fixin’s buffet. Oh, the cheese! Oh, the bacon! Oh, the…everything! Oh, the delicious! Soft drinks also provided to wash down your delightful creations. There will also be special brainy guests in addition to the dinner burlesque show!

Tickets Are Now Available!

crowley-and-aziraphale - by Sarah Linde

This is “Crowley and Aziraphale”, by Sarah Linde, based on characters in “Good Omens” by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Presumably, both of them are hanging out and relaxing while they wait for GKE to come around.


Tickets to the world’s greatest geeky kink event are NOW available!  Remember, this event DOES sell out and DOES hit its attendance cap–NO tickets will be sold at the door.

Tickets are on our famous sliding scale of $50 or $70 – pay what YOU fell you can afford!  We trust you.

You can get tickets right on our tickets page!

To stay at our hotel, The Radisson of Piscataway, just be sure to call them (don’t use their website) at 732-980-0400, and DO tell them it’s for “GKE” or “The Geeky Kink Event” – if you don’t mention the event, they’ll tell you the hotel is sold out!

And yes…rumours are true.  We WILL have a giant robot that you can tie people to at this year’s Geeky Kink Event!  Check it out:

Photo by Babs Who Takes Pictures -

Photo by Babs Who Takes Pictures –

New shibari book by last year’s Nerdvert of Honor – Help!

Lee Harrington, Nerdvert of Honor for GKE Classic 2013, has a new shibari book and needs your help to fund it! More Shibari You Can Use: Passionate Rope Bondage and Intimate Connection features gorgeous full color photos by friend of GKE, RiggerJay!

Real people of various sizes, genders, orientations, and relationship styles (like poly!) are all represented in the book. There are also some nerdy pics (including Lee tying up a chair) and people untying each other and having fun.

Take a look at the indiegogo link here, which ends 2/10/2014:

GKE: New England bonus!

When you contribute at or higher than the $25 level, and the the fundraiser goes above the 40k mark, you’ll get a 10% off ticket code to GKE: New England.

In Lee’s own words:
“I really want to get this book out into the world because we need books not just about the “how-to” of bondage (which the book has a lot of), but the *why* of bondage. Readers will get a chance to connect more with their partners through a variety of exercises that explore touch, sensual dominance and submission, intimacy and trust. The book also brings some more intermediate techniques for those ready for a challenge, broken down into clear picture-by-picture directions for new and experienced riggers alike (ranging from Texas handcuffs up to head cages and reverse box ties).

I’m also a fan, like yourself, of sexy models of all sizes, ages, genders and ethnic backgrounds. By breaking the mold away from a world that says only a small demographic of individuals can have a sexually adventurous life, the clear step-by-step material in “More Shibari” will be bringing easy opportunities for fun and artistic play to a broader audience. Which is about bloody time, right?”

Thank you for an amazing GKE III!


We hope to see you again at GKE New England (August 15-17, the Sheraton of Warwick, RI) – and at GKE Classic III: Wherein We Tie You To A Giant Robot – that’ll be .(Nov. 7th-9th, 2014, back at the Radisson)!  Hotel rooms are now available for GKENE – you can get them

at!  Get ‘em before they run out!  You can get hotel rooms for GKE Classic by calling 732-980-0400!

Also, the presenter application is up!  Do you have something geeky, kinky, and awesome you’d like to present on at GKE?  Fill out the application here:

You should definitely join the conversation!  And you can find us online at!

Finally, come see us in May at the world’s largest Steampunk event,

The Steampunk World’s Fair!


All Of The Info!

Here are All (okay, most of) The Things you’ll need to know to enjoy your time at GKE: Curse Your Sudden But Inevitable Convention!

The Hotel

GKE is located at the Radisson on 21 Kingsbridge Road in Piscataway, NJ.

The overflow hotel is the Embassy Suites, which is literally one parking lot over!

The event opens at 5pm on Friday, November 7thst and ends and 5pm on Sunday, November 9th.

If you have not already registered for this event, we apologize but registration and ticket transfers are now closed and you cannot purchase tickets at the door.

Event check-in hours:

Friday: noon-10 pm (possibly later if it’s busy)
Saturday: 10am – 10pm
Sunday: 9am – 1pm

The schedule!

Here’s the online, interactive schedule via for last year. You can create an account to keep track of the classes and events you want to go to, read bios and class descriptions, get updates on classes/events you sign up for, and more!

For those of you who’re more in the Luddite line of geekery, here is the b/w grid schedule that will also be available in print at the event: GKE2013ScheduleFinal

Rules & Harassment Policy

And behold! A link to our rules! And hark! Another link to our Harassment Policy!

2013′s Schedule!


Behold!  Last year’s schedule!  This is a great preview of what’s in store for you in the coming year!  Take a look – you can see the whole thing at via this snazzy piece of sofware we use,  Check it out:!

For more information about the geektacular sexiness of using for this year’s schedule (including mobile app, tie-in to Guidebook, hooking up to your iCal/Outlook/Google, and so much more) check out the fetlife announcement post.

Behold…the schedule! Well, the rough draft that is almost done!

We wanted to give you a taste of what delightful things you have in store, so we decided to put this up as soon as we could. Soon it will be prettied, polished, and perfected…but for now, we give you the rough draft of the GKE Classic Schedule!


We’re doing the Happy Dance and hope you are, too!
Image courtesy of the ever-entertaining

Special Events

Dinner With Cthulhu - by Mitra

Mmm, tasty Cthulhu – by Mitra

“At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.”

-George Carlin

I don’t care where I sit, as long as I get fed.
~Calvin Trillin

We’re splendidly happy to offer you two spectacular experiences which are both culinarily splendid and, as is our trademark, uniquely geeky and frequently naked.  We most cordially invite you to…

Dinner With Cthulhu

mollies - gk3 - russ kuhner

The Mollyhouse – performing “Slagtown Abby”. Photo by Russ Kuhner!

Dinner With Cthulhu is our premium show.  It stars our burlesque troupe, Uncle Monty’s Mollyhouse, the acclaimed burlesque/comedy/madness troupe.  There’ll be humor, satire, and wit.  There’ll be disrobing, dance, and delicious snark!   Some of their skits may be rather Lovecraftian. They probably won’t drive you mad with horrific understanding of things best left unknown. That would be dessert.

They’ll delight you, amuse you, and move you to fits of laughter.  If that doesn’t work, they’ll throw their clothes at you.  They’l be performing an interactive bawdy Victorian show for your edification and pleasure.  Mostly pleasure.  Okay, almost entirely pleasure.

As it was written, “When dead Cthulhu rises from his house at R’lyeh, there’ll be an omnisexual cast of terribly attractive dandies to make fun of it.

But that’s not all!  The dinner theatre tickets also include:

Dinner With Cthulhu!  All-you-can-eat!  (No, really, this is an all-you-can-eat event.  It’s not actually an event wherein Cthulhu eats you.  While that would be ironic and interesting, when given the choice between having unlimited tasty food and being devoured by horrors from a world beyond normal ken, we’ll usually take tasty food.)

Please note:  This is not “hotel sushi”; we’ve brought in a sushi chef to make all of the sushi in his restaurant and bring it over, freshly and within minutes, to this dinner.  This is restaurant-quality sushi, plus a freshly-catered, limited-edition of the Radisson’s breakfast, personally prepared by their head chef!

The menu features a combination of two of our attendees’ favorite things – a Breakfast Buffet with fresh eggs, fluffy pancakes, sausage, and, of course, bacon bacon bacon bacon  bacon; with gourmet Awesome Sauce (no, really, Awesome Sauce is a thing)  and an all-you-can-eat supply of freshly-made Sushi.   If you can find another dinner theatrical which features restaurant-quality sushi and unlimited bacon for this price, we’ll eat our hats.  Those of us who don’t own hats will buy them.

This is a lovely event for bringing a date, and a grand way to meet people.

Here’s Iris Explosion of Uncle Monty’s Mollyhouse at one of our other events, The Steampunk World’s Fair:

Tickets for the Dinner are $45 per person.

Even if you’ve already got tickets, you can add this special event at!



Eating Candy Off Of Naked People


There’ve been a few events which have had situations where people eat sushi off of other folks. It’s often in very formal settings, sometimes as part of rather fancy events.

We love sushi, but we also REALLY love candy, and we decided to choose “eating candy” because candy’s affordable, fun, and fits the playful nature of our event.

…okay, who are we kidding? WE JUST WANTED AN EXCUSE TO EAT A LOT OF CANDY.


Tickets are $21 per person.

Even if you’ve already got tickets, you can add this special event at!

Welcome to The Geeky Kink Event!

Ballpit eats Jesse P

We are held November 1st-3rd, in lovely Piscataway, New Jersey!

Remember!  Ticket sales are almost over!   Get them now – there are NO ticket sales at the door!

Are you on Fetlife? Find us there -!

GKE II was pretty amazingly awesome, thanks to all the wonderful people who helped make it so! GKE 2013 is again the first weekend in November (that’s November 1-3, 2013!), and we’re back be at the Radisson of Piscataway.  There are many excellent hotels in the area, AND there’s a volunteer room and ride share you can use if you’d like – that’s right here!

We’re honored to have, as our Guest of Honor, the noted author, speaker, teacher, and kink innovator Lee Harrington!  Find out more on our workshop page!

Lee is not simply an extraordinary teacher and educator, he’s also amazingly sweet, fun to be around and (not so secretly) more than a bit of a geek.   He’s taught all over the world, and he’s possibly coming all the way from Alaska just to be with us!

And don’t forget to check out our awesome catered Special Events!

 Vendorfolk: Vending applications are now closed for 2013.  

Registration is now open!

If you have any questions please email For questions about existing registrations, please email  Looking forward to seeing you!

Please note: As of September 24th, the event is just under 70% sold out.  We do expect to sell out in the next few weeks – we recommend you get tickets soon!

Register for The Geeky Kink Event NJ at!

If you’re interested in our non-geeky events, might we suggest our Telsa Museum Benefit, The Geek Creation Show, or the Facebook page forVoltaire’s Wicked NecroComicCon?  And if you’re in New Jersey this October, you might want to try The International Steampunk City!